The Superbowl

Though I often think that Indiana and Illinois should feel like brother-states, given our histories, this weekend Hoosiers are going down.



Football is the best sport. Everybody who disagrees is simply wrong. Why are they wrong?
Here is a short litany of reasons:

1) Football is sporting. It is not just raw force or stamina (like running or boxing). It involves finesse and thinking.

2) Football is a true team sport. People claim the "activity called soccer," Hockey, and Basketball, rugby are team sports, when in fact, they are really a collection of individuals all doing the same boring thing (striking or grabbing an object). Baseball and Football actually involve teammates who have different tasks and abilities to coordinate their activities to achieve a collective goal. This makes them more humane and interesting.

3) Football is tough, masculine, and non-sissy. This cannot be said for soccer, tennis, etc.

4) Football is objective and fair. Some sports, like hockey and soccer have such low scores that the winner of the game is almost arbitrary. A good deal of luck goes into the scoring events in these sports, particularly soccer. In fact, these sports also have high frequencies of ties. In soccer this is resolved with the idiotic shootout, which is basically an exercise in arbitrariness. Hockey is fairer in that it has sudden death.

5) Football is steeped in traditions. Traditions that other sports don’t have. Marching bands do not march for Soccer or Volleyball. Homecoming does not happen for baseball or cross-country. Though I generally condemn cheerleading, at least it is a genuine tradition.

6) Football involved a constellation of abilities. Intelligence, speed, strength, throwing ability, catching ability, tackling ability, stamina, ability to endure extreme weather, etc. No sport compares in the diversity of abilities.
7) Football is played rain or shine in cold and heat.

I am thinking of more, but I need to go to class now.